I’ve been on holiday with my family for a week at the coast, soaking up the warmth and the sea. It is truly therapeutic swimming in the sea and breathing in the sea air. I’m much better at counting my blessings and savouring all that is wonderful, now that I’m on the other side of illness.
I’m well enough to actively take an interest in our activities and to play with my girls. I’m not really a beach person as my complexion is fair and the sand usually irritates me. But this time, I played beach ball, I swam in the sea, I pretended to be a shark, I built sandcastles, half-buried my girls in the sea sand and generally had a lot of fun. My eldest daughter even said to me “Mom, you’re like a kid.”
Looking back on previous holidays I see a huge difference. When I was sick, I was tired all the time and so grumpy as a result. I shouted at my girls for small things and couldn’t enjoy myself. I couldn’t wait to get home and back to the comfort of my routine. Even before going on this holiday, I was quite fearful. I was scared of not having enough to eat since I have to be gluten free. I was afraid of not having all my health foods around me like my chai concoction, my MCT oil and the beetroot and apple salads. I wasn’t able to alkalize my system by having warm lemon juice and I had far too much sugar.
I was afraid that all these things would cause me to slip back into a state of being exhausted. But they didn’t. I only needed one afternoon nap in a week and I even had a tiny bit of wine, twice. I have eaten things that are really not good for me but I’m still okay. This has been an eye opening experience for me. Certainly, I will return to my healthy eating when I”m back home but I’m pleased that my health didn’t collapse. And this shows me that I’m as recovered as I’d hoped.
I have been feeling very sorry for myself that I’m so restricted in what I eat. But now I feel that I have plenty of things available to enjoy. I’ve earmarked restaurants that are catering for gluten free eating and it’s great to know that the other healthy eating is by choice. It’s far easier to stick to a diet by choice and not enforced by external forces. Intrinsic goals are far easier to achieve than extrinsic goals, anyway.
Now I feel that I can truly live a full life because this holiday has shown me that I’m starting to build reserves and my base health is solid. It was only in testing my resilience that I feel stronger and the fear has gone.Follow me: