In the past week or so I’ve felt such powerful joy, more pronounced than at any other time of my life. It’s hard to say what has triggered this emotion but one thing is for sure, I want more of it!
I think much of it has to do with my book nearing completion and releasing the need for final tweaks. I have also had an idea to make cards as an accompaniment to the book, and another method to reach my audience. The cards give me complete license to be creative and to call it work, which is just glorious in itself. I have designed a few of the cards and am completely thrilled with the way they are taking shape.
My advanced Toastmasters manuals arrived in the post this weekend, allowing me the opportunity to refine my public speaking. I will get the chance to practice story telling and professional speaking in the supportive environment of my club. I’m excited to get going and it is thrilling to know I’ll have the chance to grow my skills and my offering further.
Friends have also encouraged me to resurrect my workshops that I started designing last year. They even offered to be a rent-a-crowd if I have to face the embarrassment of no-one signing up. I must say I am truly blessed to have met the people I have met in the past few years on this recovery journey.
It feels like the floodgates of opportunities and ideas have opened and I am now spoilt for choice as to what to work on in a day. I am the kind of person who truly likes to finish what she starts so I know I wont get myself off track or depleted. I know that this work I do doesn’t deplete me, it energises me. This is the way I can tell that I’m on the right path, doing the right work for my personality.
The way I feel now is that nothing can ruin my day or that nothing can take away my happiness. I have this inner knowing about my career path and the things that I occupy my time with. I don’t need anyone’s approval or for anyone to believe or acknowledge me or my ideas. I know that this is right and that feeling is like hitting the jackpot for me.
This joy overflows onto my family and anyone I encounter in my day. I have so much energy at the moment which is a big deal for me as I recover from burnout. I’m able to tackle things that I didn’t have the energy for, even a few months ago. I am exercising about five days a week, I’m able to look after my children, I am proactively cleaning out cupboards at home, baking and sorting out a lot of undone admin that has been bothering me for a while.
I’m also learning what depletes me and what energises me. I’m more aware of people and situations that I find tiring and I’m scheduling rest afterwards. I’m also steering myself as much as possible towards the things and people that do energise me, so that I can maintain these high levels of energy. I might in fact be operating just like everyone else for the first time in many years. It just feels like I’m on rocket fuel because of the utter collapse of my energy during my illness.
I’m sorry that I can’t offer a recipe for joy to others as the process of getting here has been complicated and convoluted. Perhaps this is a subject of a book or another blog post once I have had some time to digest and to unpack this joy. For now, I’m just reveling in it and doing all the things I know to be right for me at this time.Follow me: